Review: We'll Never Have Paris

"Are you ready to marry the first girl you've ever been with?" Quinn (Simon Helberg) is asked. That's not really the question Quinn ponders, but rather whether or not he should pass up the opportunity to experience the wonderland that is Kelsey (Maggie Grace), the lithe and leggy co-worker who confesses her feelings for him after he shares his plan to propose to his girlfriend of ten years, Devon (Melanie Lynskey).

Confused by his conundrum, Quinn accidentally breaks up with Devon, who runs off to her parents whilst he goes to see Kelsey and give in to temptation. Their awkward attempt at sex bursts his fantasy and he suddenly finds himself repulsed by her messy apartment, the way she chews her gum, and even her creamsicle-coloured lipstick. He goes running back to Devon, who seems willing to forgive him until she learns of his encounter with Kelsey. Suggesting they take the time to find themselves and what they want out of life, she goes off to Paris.

Quinn soon follows her to the City of Lights, where he discovers he has some serious competition in the form of the suave and cultured - and infinitely less neurotic - Guillaume (Ebon Moss-Bachrach from Girls). Will Quinn talk his way back into Devon's affections or dig himself deeper into trouble?

We'll Never Have Paris was based on Helberg's own obstacle-strewn courtship of now wife and co-director Jocelyn Towne. There is some comedy to be had from the scenario, and it was well and truly had in the 1972 version of The Heartbreak Kid as well as in any Woody Allen film from the Seventies and Eighties. Helberg exaggerates his Big Bang Theory character's nervous and neurotic disposition, but whether Quinn comes off as charming or off-putting is wholly subjective.

Regardless, it's difficult to fathom why Lynskey's Devon would tolerate the fretful worrywart for ten years; Kelsey's continued pursuit of him is as bewildering. Pity poor Maggie Grace who has to make heads and tails out of the film equivalent of a paper doll. Lynskey fares slightly better if only because Lynskey is an actor with deep emotional reserves. The scene where Devon almost forgives then rebuffs Quinn is easily the film's best, and it's all due to Lynskey's emotional transparency.

Helberg and Towne do little to smooth out the sitcomish execution, but were wise to cast Alfred Molina and Judith Light in cameos as Quinn's father and Devon's mother, respectively. Then there's Zachary Quinto, delighting as Quinn's rich friend and confidante, swanning around in sarongs and caftans, making like the Buddha masquerading as Agony Aunt.

We'll Never Have Paris

Directed by: Simon Helberg, Jocelyn Towne

Written by: Simon Helberg, Jocelyn Towne

Starring: Simon Helberg, Melanie Lynskey, Maggie Grace, Zachary Quinto, Ebon Moss-Bachrach, Alfred Molina, Judith Light, Jason Ritter